Friday, 23 April 2010

The Marmite of all jokes

You'll either love this or hate it.

A bloke walks into the Casino bar. He is immacculately dressed and the epitome of style, but the barman can't help noticing that he has a giant orange in place of a head.

Brunettes stare at him rather curiously but the blondes stare at him with an affection that is far more than the merely curious.

He goes up to the bar and orders a drink. The barman duly obliges and the bloke flips a gold krugerrand at him saying in an honestly casual manner "Keep the change my friend."

"Excuse me sir .." says the barman "but this is a krugerrand .. are you sure you want me to keep the change?"

"Aye .. nae bother mate." and then leans forward and whispers "I don't like broadcasting it, but I've got literally millions of them. Keep it quiet though .. I don't like the attention"

Gratefull the barman thanks him and now only wishing to help the bloke in any way he can he leans forward and whispers "I don't know if Sir is aware of this, but you do realise you've got a giant orange instead of a head?"

"Aye .. ah know," says the bloke, "Ah've had it for years."

"Would it be rude to ask how you came to have it, Sir?" whispers the barman.

"Naw, not at all. You see, one day I was clearing out my attic when I found an old brass lamp. I gave it a rub and a beautiful genie appeared and granted me three wishes. So ah immediately wished for a million krugerrands, and "BANG!!!" ma attic was filed with stacks and stacks of boaxes aw full o' gold coins.

"Then I wished to be atractive to all blondes. The genie waved her hand and, even if ah dae say so ma'sel, blondes canny keep their hot, dirty little mitts aff ma boady"

"I see sir .." said the barman, fully enthralled by the story so far "and what happened then?"

"Well then - and I dae still feel like a bit of a arsehole aboot this - I wished fur a giant orange for a heid."

Monday, 19 April 2010

Tears of Aquanna

Star Wars meets Bluenote Jazz, Tears of Aquanna is the debut album from Figrin D'an and the Modal Notes.  At least it is in my mind.  The title is taken from Wookipedia, it's amazing the back stories attributed to Star Wars characters.

When I say amazing I mean tragic...I think.  I spent hours on the site today : )

Commrade Monkski

Here's my entry to a Soviet Space Race T-Shirt competition over on Redbubble.  My inspiration is Zhakonya, one of two monkeys to set the simian space endurance record.  I'm pretty sure they were Spider Monkeys but I've used artistic licence to creat my propoganda style T-Shirt.

It's also available as a print, card, postcard and canvas and you can visit the competition here on Redbubble.

X-Wing sales picking up

It's Luke's control panel from his X-Wing and I sold my third one this morning.  There are a good few Star Wars shirts out there so I'll get round to finding my 10 favorites and share them on here.


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